I've never been one to call myself a blogger, and as I look at my blogging history, it is pretty apparent that I am not exactly consistent. Even this past month, as I fought to get focused and blog more during the season of lent, I found it difficult to buckle down (as is evident by my lack of blogs).
But isn't that the way it is with any discipline?...Whether it is exercise, heathly eating, or just trying to learn a new skill, I have such a hard time slowing down my world long enough to actually integrate any new habit into my schedule. Who's with me?! We buck the word discipline - we want to live our lives free of commitments, schedules, and deadlines - right?!
I was reading the book "Spiritual Leadership" by Henry and Richard Blackaby last night and was challenged as the authors wrote about a leader's time management. Their bottom line was this, "Good leaders know when to say 'no.'" I may be the only person that struggles with the "Yes Man" disease, but I can't seem to say "no" to anything, and according to this book, it's a pride issue. My desire to have my hand in absolutely everything means one of two things.
1) I'm just that ignorantly kind-hearted and want to give give give of myself until there is nothing left. 2) I don't think it(the event, the lesson, the organization) will be as good without me.
Neither one of those options seem very attractive to me, but truth be told, there is a goodness of my heart in the desire to be involved, but I would be lying if I told you #2 wasn't a reality as well. I've always prided myself in how little sleep I can run on, how much energy I have, and how many hats I can wear at one time....however, that often results in me getting attention, praise, and honor and very little of that getting passed on to who really deserves it.
Jesus was a man who knew how to set boundaries. He knew when to teach, when to be in public, and when to retreat into the wilderness and be alone with His Father. It was all about priorities. He knew he was nothing apart from His father. I need that same awareness.
I need to know when to say no, when to retreat, and when to slow down and even when to blog. Even in the past 15 minutes as I've sat here at my computer and typed all this out...I feel like it's begining to sink in. As I move forward toward Easter, I praise God that his love for me is not based on my performance or my ability to blog consistently....
I'm a son of the King, and that is a truth I can rest in.
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YES!!!! Dude it's because youre a servant, that's your gifting. You have a yes heart zack, don't buck that. It's who God made you to be my brother, but you recognize not to be compulsive and just say yes. Being compulsive is a cheap imitation of faith. We want to do what we see our Daddy doing and say what we hear him saying....like our big brother Jesus HAHA. To do this we minister from the spirit, not from the flesh. Because the flesh relies on human reason to come to a productive conclusion and result disregarding that Daddy doesn't operate in the parameters and paradigms we think it should look like. It's awesome you can see the scheme of the enemy to snare you into pride. We can boast in nothing, but Jesus Christ. Any revelation, sermon, word, healing, or whatever is because of his Grace (things given underserved) we been freely given from Papa. So i can never say i earned it by how much i study or serve and so on. It's only by that favor we don't deserve that he pours himself out over us, reveals himself, and gives us what we need for the situation. Sorry to ramble on, i was jus commenting actually to let you know i read this and it's GOOD! LIve in the rest of who he is and who you are literally in him. I love you zack
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement brother....may we never boast in anything but the love, grace, power, and authority of Jesus...love you man.
DeleteI don't think you should feel bad for being engaged. There are two kinds of jobs. One is the calling. The other one is the wage work. Thank God for those finding pleasure in the calling! With respect to being Christians there are similarly two kinds of commitment. And I, being a Lutheran, believe strongly a wage worker in no way will satisfy the expectations of God.
ReplyDeleteMr. Anders, first of all, thanks for the comment. It's great to know that there are folks out there that find my blog interesting.
DeleteSecondly, as far as feeling bad for being engaged goes...I think I was trying to say the exact opposite. By being involved in so much, it is often difficult to actually be fully present in one place at one time. My mind often races ahead in my schedule and I find it difficult to think of creative ways to love my wife because I am too busy thinking of the next kid I need to pick up. Or I slack in my preperation for a teaching because I over committed by time. All I was trying to say is that I want to be fully present wherever I am.
I am humbled by the fact that God in His grace called me to a life of ministry, but I want to be a good steward of this life. In five years, I want to have grown, to have made a difference and to live a life that will leave a legacy. I don't want to look in the rear view mirror and just say, "well, at least I stayed busy."
Even in my personal quiet time with the Lord, I don't want to sit down with an agenda and stay long enough that I get satisfied. I want to stay before Him, in stillness, in quietness, in His presence until He is satisfied.
Bottom line, I am nothing apart from the grace, love, and discipline of God. I want to be fully present wherever I am - whoever I'm with.
Thanks again for the comment. Hope to hear more from you.
-ZB